Ratchet and Clank: It Made Gaming Fun Again

           

           Every three weeks I participate in this same awkward ritual, I sit on my couch, boot up a game, play it for a moment and quickly turn it off.  I do this about three times before turning to my roommate and complain about having nothing to play.  It has become this annoying cycle that is only occasionally broken by a certain game.  For a while The Division was the answer, until I lost faith in that typical MMO cycle.  The Witness held my attention for the game’s entirety, but for obvious reasons it lacked replay value. Since then I was longing for a game to grab me again, to really remind me why I am a gamer. Then out of nowhere I found Ratchet and Clank.

            I’ve always known about this game series, but I was a Ratchet virgin before this new reboot.  I bought this game on a recommendation (from Kinda Funny’s Colin Moriarty via PS. I Love You xoxo) and just as he declared, this is Playstation 4’s best exclusive.  There is something really special about Ratchet and Clank, while the game’s marketing has stated it’s a game based on the movie based on the game, it never feels like a remastered version of it’s 14-year old predecessor.  This game could have very easily been a rehash of the old game with just some nicer graphics.  Instead developer Insomniac went the extra mile (despite never playing the original, my roommate did and filled me in on what was there and what wasn’t) they remade and added to their already existing game.  They added new systems, like each weapon’s upgrade tree, they even parsed in a few extra missions and completely recreated the original story.

            According to my Ratchet and Clank guru the game begins in an entirely new way, with an extraordinary cut scene starring, my personal favorite character, Captain Qwark as he tells his side of Ratchet and Clank’s first adventure.  After watching just this scene I knew I was playing something very special.  It was like watching a Pixar movie and I was shocked as I started to control a character that was Pixar beautiful.  It’s a game that looks far better than anything I ever imagined, not only is every character precisely animated, each planet and little detail is something to be marveled at.  Along with the visuals the game’s writing is noticeably epic, it plays to both kids and adults.  It reminded me of watching Zootopia, where sure kids could laugh at the crazy animals and situations, but every little joke was crafted for people far older.  It’s a game I could sit with for hours and find something new to enjoy every thirty minutes.

            To me that is where Ratchet and Clank succeeds, it’s simply fun.  While every cut scene is beautiful and clever, nothing compares to the actual gameplay.  Insomniac has made a game that perfectly balances two genres: making a third person shooter fused with a 3D platformer.  Exploring the different planets is almost as enjoyable as an epic firefight.  Though nothing compares to shooting the endless hordes of enemies spread across each level.

            Every level is densely populated with enemies for Ratchet and Clank to obliterate.  This endless slaughter-fest is by far the most fun I’ve had in gaming in quite some time.  As with all other Ratchet and Clank games the true fun comes from the zany arsenal at the players disposal.  There are traditional blaster and rocket launcher all the way to a murder-hungry robot companion Mr. Zurkon that helps destroy enemies while spouting out hilarious one-liners.  My personal favorite weapon is the groovitron, a small grenade that makes any enemy (even bosses) dance uncontrollably for a short period of time.  That weapon tagged along with the powerful sheepinator, a gun that turns any enemy into a helpless sheep, quickly became one of my favorite gaming moments of the year.  The amount of weapons manages to make each level filled with challenging hilarious firefights that never get old.

            I think the reason Ratchet and Clank is a true gem is the amount of pure joy I felt every second I played it.  Despite the rare moments when you are forced in awkward ship combat or the few times you play at just Clank, it’s a game that has practically no downside.  It’s a game that leaves a smile on your face.  It’s stellar writing and zany gameplay make it a fun romp from start to finish.  Ratchet and Clank made gaming fun again, it made me feel like a kid that was just playing a game to have fun rather than a truly gritty experience that could change my life.

            I recommend what in my opinion is Playstation 4’s best exclusive as a must play.  Do yourself a favor and go have fun with Ratchet and Clank.

Why I’m falling in love with The Division

            While recently looking through a list I keep that contains every game I’ve played in 2016 a thought came to me: I play a lot of video games. It’s only the middle of March and I’ve played about eight different titles.  Lucky we will live in a gaming world where not one of these eight was a AAA game and my bank account wasn’t diminished like many would think.  Now when The Division came out I swore I wasn’t going to buy it, that I couldn’t spend any more money on games, that this game wasn’t worth my $60.  So I did what any young adult living on his on dime would do, I redboxed it and after five hours I was pissed. Why you ask? I knew within that small amount of time that I needed to buy The Division.

            Now luckily I’m semi crafty and found a few games to trade in and managed to not spend a penny of my hard-earned money. Now I just started The Division, but I think I’m in love or I’m slowly falling in with this fantastic game.  I know what you’re thinking: “Jake it’s too early to declare your love” or “It’s the honey moon stage and your bound to have a few unknown issues down the line.” While those are all fair points, I know I’m right. I am in love.

            I once asked a question to a mentor: “What is the difference between loving someone and falling in love with someone?” He thought for a bit and then gave me an answer that I will remember forever. “You don’t choose to fall in love, it happens unexpectedly.  It’s terrifying because no one ever plans on falling, falling in love is out of your control.” (Full disclosure that’s not an actual quote, but it’s what I took away from his answer) With The Division I never planned on loving it, hell three days ago I didn’t plan on buying it.  Then I tried it out, like a first date, and after just one date I wanted more, I wanted it enough to commit to it and know I’m in a committed loving relationship with The Division.

            Now as for why I love it, it’s actually quite simple- this game screams Jake.  Now the only thing that could make it more Jake is if had any Jedi.  Though despite this it bleeds Jake, so let me got through the checklist.  Does it take place in my favorite city New York? Yep.  Is it a third person shooter? Well of course. Is it set in a post apocalyptic world? Do I like pizza? (Yes I do, it’s possibly my favorite food)  Is this a game that is based on a loot system? (or grabbing that next gun, chest plate or scarf to make your character better).  Does a bear shit in the woods? They do.  And lastly, The Division is a multiplayer game I can play by myself.

            The Division’s setting is the world’s greatest city, New York, after a chemical attack.  The in-game map is a massive chunk of Manhattan.  The game uses this city in a lovely way that incorporates the harshness of winter and the desperate feeling of destruction that the city has gone through.  The city is beautiful and melds with the games many different objectives, whether it is a full story mission or a small-scale hostage rescue that pops up as you roam Hell’s Kitchen.  The map is engaging and even at some times overwhelming as a boatload of icons cover your map.  The strategy I have to use is in game management, where in order to not be besieged with countless missions I focus on either a certain district or a certain type of mission.

            The mission verity is one part of unexpected greatness from The Division.  I figured it would be just another Destiny, where every mission involved you going from point A to point B, but here every mission has some unique aspect that makes it all feel different.  Each side mission has some reward that makes a trivial task seem worth it, and each story mission feels like it was ripped out of a single player campaign.  The story seems to be well thought out rather than the shoe in that Destiny’s story was.  The Destiny comparisons seem to come naturally since each game was trying to achieve relatively the same thing.

            Their objective is quite clear: make an on console MMO, or massive multiplayer online game.  While Destiny easily looked this way with a massive hub world and random players running around like jack-asses on every planet.  The Division’s world isn’t cluttered with any of that, it’s basically my version of New York.  Each mission seems as if I am the cities last hope, these don’t feel like something other players have done before.  It’s exciting to take on a boss, as they seem genuinely threatening, every time a boss appeared I was running for my life rather than the boss acting as my personal bullet sponge.  There’s just something special about The Division’s missions, it’s an MMO that allows you to take ownership.

            Though my real sense of ownership comes with my character, or as they’re called in-game an Agent.  My Agent is truly my own, though the initial face customization is a little lackluster, the world of customization expands as you discover weapons, gear and (my favorite part) clothes.  Each MMO is all about the loot you get from killing enemies, completing quests or just scavenging around the world and The Division nails this.  As I wander around this desolate New York the best part is how I’m slowly updating my arsenal.  Within just four hours my primary weapon change three times as I swapped out a heavy machine gun with the assault rifle I’m current use.  The loot is just consistently gratifying and makes you feel that playing The Division is actually worth it.  Each weapon, while not being vastly different, feels somewhat unique and worth finding.  Armor on the other hand is perhaps The Division’s most innovative feature.

            The game’s armor selection is truly impressive as each piece: backpack, holster, kneepads, etc. add up to your total armor point count.  While this isn’t anything that different from other MMOs the true game changer is that none of this armor affects your outward appearance.  Your Agents outward appearance comes from something entirely different, a selection of clothing found around New York.  Though this may not seem like a big deal it is in fact an epic change to that MMO format.  Now that annoying decision of better looking verse better armor is no longer relevant.  Just like Hannah Montana you get the best of both worlds.  This is weirdly enough one of my favorite features in The Division and I couldn’t be my excited to customize my Agent while keeping on that blue bomber jacket.

            The last part of The Division that is exciting is a place no one wants to go: The Dark Zone.  This scary place is in the middle of New York, it is the place that was affected most by the virus, and it’s a place where anything can happen.  In the Dark Zone players may work together to obtain exclusive gear only found there, but it comes at a price, every player may kill another player for their loot.  It’s a place where teamwork is necessary, but trust is terrifying.  Here is where the end game lies and I cannot wait to level up just to explore The Dark Zone.

            The Division isn’t without it’s issues, but those are heavily outweighed by the positives.  The game has so much going for it and I know that my lovely relationship will continue to blossom.  If everything goes as I think it will proceed then I will be committed to The Division for quite some time.  I’m in love with The Division and I recommend you take the leap.  It won’t disappoint you.

Why Movies are so Important to Me

There is this one place: this one place manages to make me truly calm, focused, and in the moment.  That place, sadly a place where many no longer feel safe, is a movie theater.  The movie theater is my temple, my holy place because to me movies are the purest form of entertainment.  There are many reasons why I love movies and its theater, so let me just dive into them.

            If you didn’t know  I get a tad more stressed out than others around me.  So what this lovely trait of mine I am rarely in the moment or I over analysis everything, like a text message or just any possible outcome to a scenario.  But at the movie theater for some reason I am completely present.  My mind isn’t racing, trying to deceive me or even consume me, no, while I sit in that seat I’m there and no where else. To me a movie is the perfect stabilizer, it’s a place where you can truly lose yourself, a place to escape from the hardship of life.

            I’ve always found solace in movies, ranging from me at three years old to even now, they’re my holy place.  I guess this post is going to be about my Anxiety Disorder far more than I thought, but it’s only to explain my love for films.  As I’ve recently discovered my mind hates ambiguity, anything that isn’t set in stone terrifies me.  That’s where movies come in, they are set in stone, and you can’t change the end of film after you have seen it.  Darth Vader will always be Luke’s father, Marty always gets back to the future and John Bender always thrust his fist in the air.

            That’s probably why I re-watch so many movies-to center me, to put me in a moment of absolute certainty.  I know all of this sounds crazy, but for me it’s perfect.  In a way movies bring out the perfect Jake, he’s in the moment and not in that crazy head of his. But that’s juts part one on why I love movies.  The other is a phrase I didn’t invent, but manifested my own meaning for, Movie Magic.

            There’s a moment that’s incredibly rare in film, what I call Movie Magic and it’s different for everyone.  It’s that moment when something incredible happens, you smile, your heart skips a beat, and chills run down your spine; you can close your eyes and be consumed by one moment, that is my definition of movie magic.  Maybe I’m crazy and I’m the only one who closes his eyes after an amazing moment in a movie, but I really feel it.  It’s at moments like Luke sitting in his X-Wing for the first time saying “Red-5 standing by” because he finally made it, or like Will Hunting ending it with: “Sorry I had go see about a girl”, or even Marty McFly hitting 88 Miles and Hour for the first time so we could indeed see some serious shit.

            I’ve got my own list of movie magic moments, but they’re all special in their own way, it’s a moment that I am completely present in and it’s perfect.  I rarely get that anywhere else, not with a video game, or with a book, or even with people (and if I do get it with you, pat yourself on the back).  I only get that at a theater, sitting in the middle seat of the row with the bar in front, you know, the perfect seat.

            I don’t know what makes a perfect movie because to everyone a certain movie means something different. Not everyone’s favorite movie is Good Will Hunting, which is mine, some people love Pretty Woman, and hell some poor bastard out there loves George Clooney’s Batman & Robin. I’m so glad they all exist because there is something out there for everyone.  Everyone enjoys at least one movie and that’s what makes movies special they’re almost universal, yet somehow different to everyone. My movies center me and bring a moment of calm to my life and I love to hear what movies do for others.

2015: My Best Year Yet

           I do this stupid thing every New Year I keep track of all my firsts, and nothing important like my first kiss or something.  It’s the dumb little things like my first poop or drink of water.  I get this little voice in my head that says: “Well that’s your first sip of water in 2016.” The best part of all these “firsts” is that in a week I’ve already forgotten them.  But that’s just one of my New Year traditions, my other big one is claiming that the year to come will be my best one yet.  I stated it last night and I stated it every year prior.  It’s what I do.

            When asking a good friend, Jason, if he was excited for this New Year he simply replied: “I don’t know, I’ve got a lot of unknowns.”

            At first it was maybe the best response anyone has ever given this stereotypical question.  Then it made sense every year is filled with unknowns, and that’s why I claim that this year will be my best yet.

            Once this future year has been claimed as “Soon to be Jake’s Greatest Year of All-Time” I remember that moment 365 days before where I claimed the same thing.  I remember how different I was and how in just one year I drastically changed.  I’m talking the big change; not like my hairstyle (though I did start to do this gel-part-swoop thing in my hair, it’s going well) I’m talking about who I am and what I want.  After that thought I think about how this new Jake got here, how 2015 was my best year yet, because it made this version this of myself and this Jake is best one yet.

            So 2015, it’s big deal, but why was it my best year?  It’s probably hard to explain in detail, but I’m going to try because why the hell not.  2015 was the year I graduated college, got my heartbroken, found my best friends, and saw Star Wars Episode 7.  It was filled with ups and downs, but looking at those four huge things only one is negative and I’m still glad it happened.  I’m glad it all happened.

            In my short 22 years of living I’ve done a lot of cool shit, I jumped out of a plane this year, but I don’t think anything compared to walking across a stage and receiving my college degree.  It was something I never thought would happened and if knew me ages 6-14 my guess is you thought the same, and I wouldn’t blame you.  But I did it, I was a “normal kid” at that moment or so I thought, though I now know I was special, after all I had special education.  Out the thousands of people getting their degrees or watching someone they love accomplishing this great task only ten knew my story.  A story chockfull of anxiety, depression, special education and an amazing support system: that somehow saved a kid who didn’t think he could be saved.  It was surreal to stand their holding a college degree that was mine. I couldn’t believe it; it felt impossible and yet 2015 was the year I did it.  It was the year I graduated college.

            Though what life doesn’t tell you is that after college it’s not perfect in fact it’s far from it.  For the first time you’re on your own and I was really on my own, I don’t need to talk about it, but break-ups are devastating.  When you have that average negative mindset, and for quite awhile I did, it felt like the world was ending.  Then these awesome people in my life did everything in their power to keep me afloat while I believed I was sinking.  Finally, my mind set started to change I stopped think that this break-up was about losing everything and I noticed it became about all I gained from it. Through her I found these people, Colt and Hannah, that are now part of my family.  I got lucky, life gave me all I needed and took away what I didn’t.  The heartbreak made me realize that I need focus on what’s best for me, that in a relationship my happiness should be what’s important too. Now, my friends are the most important part.

            2015 was filled with a bunch of new people tossed in to my life, in fact my close friends all came from this year.  It’s weird how you find the important people in strangest ways and this was very evident this year.  It’s fun to look back and think to yourself: “how’d I get here.”  My friends, who are basically my family now, were found and kept because I stayed 500 miles away from San Diego for a reason that didn’t really pay off.  Now the reasons I stay (despite the contracted year-rental agreement) are these people, the ones I call my crew, each of these four people make luckiest man alive.  I don’t think many people have a group like I do. I’m so blessed to have four people that would drop anything for me and I love knowing that they rely on me too, we’re basically a family now and when I’m with them I’m home.

            This year I really got to return home, for the first time in ten years I went back to my galaxy far, far away and in that seat I was a three-year-old again.  I know there are lots of Star Wars fans out there, but I also know that many of them don’t compare to my fandom. I mean I wrote a love letter to Star Wars, you could read it here.  This year ended the perfect way, with me watching characters that feel like old friends back in action.  Seeing Star Wars: The Force Awakens was the perfect ending to my best year yet.  Star Wars is all about chance encounters and how meeting a person can change your destiny and this year I found my Han, my Leia, my Chewbacca and my R2D2.  Star Wars helped end my year in the best way.

            This year wasn’t perfect, nothing ever is, but it was damn good and I wouldn’t trade any part of it. I wouldn’t trade the heartbreak, the anger, and the sadness because I’ve already lived through awful and somehow eventually the awful turns into amazing.  Life is all about possibilities and that’s why when say: “2016 is going be the best year of my life” I really don’t know, in fact I’ve got a lot of unknowns.  But it looks really fucking promising.  Bring it on 2016.

My Favorite 10 things of 2015 (Games, Movies, Television and Comics)

Hello America! Or perhaps the only readers are my mother and father, if so thanks guys, and if not I am back to the blog.  Just like Marty tells Doc: “I am back, I’m back from the future” and this basically describes my return to the bloggy world. (Side Note: I know “bloggy” isn’t a word, but I wrote it down so what are you going to do about it?)  Now I decided to start my new blog, where I can write what ever I want about whatever I want, Since the year is coming to a close I’ve decided to write about my top 10 favorite things of 2015.  My list consists of Media related items, basically Movies, Video Games, Comics and Television Shows. Hope you enjoy!

*Don’t worry I won’t spoil anything*

10. Bloodborne

It’s no secret I hate anything horror related.  After all, who likes being scared?  So I was hesitant to even play Bloodborne for two big reasons: it looks terrifying and it’s hard as all hell.  The game’s gothic art style had me nervous because I’m easily freaked out.  The game’s difficulty was another hesitation, but I was out to prove how mentally tough I am.  Starting Bloodborne was definitely a challenge, especially because I didn’t even know you could quick attack, but after being beaten to hell again and again something clicked.  I walked through this gothic city slaying monsters with my large axe and slowly becoming more badass every five minutes.  Just working my way to each challenging boss was worthy of my time.  Each boss battle was a grueling task that mostly ended with me screaming at my television, but in that moment I was finally able kill a boss felt like the greatest accomplishment in my gaming my life.  Bloodborne is special, it perfectly embodies the phrase: “You have to risk it for the Biscuit”.  Every moment in Bloodborne was terrifying and amazing at the same time, which is why it sits at number 10 on my list.

9. Game of Thrones Season 5

 

You know how every great show has one episode that as you watch it you’re thinking: “this is the best thing I’ve ever seen!” and you know how Game of Thrones has had one of those episodes every season, well this season was my favorite yet.  Just one episode alone made it purely epic; episode 8 and I won’t spoil it, but goddamn.  This season of Game of Thrones was so different than anything on the show before and thusly I enjoyed it more than ever.  Season 4 left off  at such a unique place that it was a pleasure to see where characters ended up.  Watching Tyrion struggle with his new circumstances, Jon rising through the ranks of The Night’s Watch and Arya in a totally new land. This season of Game of Thrones was an absolute delight and, if you seen this season, that ending was something I’ll never forget.

8. Finding Spec Ops: The Line, Bastion and Ni No Kuni 

Yep, I lied; I’m a big ol’ liar.  Not everything on this list was made in 2015.  No these three games were made in years prior, but I found three great games I never knew existed. Which is actually another lie, I knew these games existed years ago, but I was using dramatic language to spice up my writing! This year I played three games that became instant favorites.  When Bastion was announced for Playstation 4 I was excited to play the critically acclaimed game, yet as I played it I forgot about the review scores or the hype.  I was experiencing Bastion as if no one had before, it’s small quaint and refreshing.  Bastion was a marvelous game I may have not normally played; surprisingly I found a game I will always love.  Bastion was good, but it can’t compare to the incredible Spec Ops: The Line (I know it’s an awful title). Despite it’s awful title it is one of the best game’s I’ve ever played.  Imaging the story of Heart of Darkness/Apocalypse Now in a Video Game. It’s a goddamn delight pairing of an epic story and fun third person shooting.  I think it’s a must play for any gamer. Then there’s Ni No Kuni a game that by all means I should hate.  It’s art style is exactly an anime, it’s a turn based JRPG and it consists of a ton of walking/XP grinding.  Though I love this game, the story is captivating, the combat is far more interactive than it should be, and the art is beautiful.  I am currently playing through this hefty JRP and am just in love with every little aspect of Ni No Kuni.

7. Jessica Jones (Netflix Show)

 

We know Iron Man, Captain America and Thor, but none of them take a shot of whiskey, curse out their best friend then punch a man across a bar. Jessica does.  Marvel’s second Netflix show is a true masterpiece and something I never thought Marvel would/could make.  This show is dark, deals with some real issues and focuses on a female lead.  It’s sad that I’m impressed by a female lead it should just be something normal, but this year things are really changing.  Women in film and television don’t have to be the damsel anymore they can be strong without being sexual and Jessica reinforces that ever-growing notion.  I fell in love with the character Jessica Jones as she starts her on going detective quest to find The Purple Man.  Along with Jessica the show is littered with awesome side characters and impressive acting.  Yet the best part of the show is the villain The Purple Man, or Killgrave, played by the fantastic David Tennant (Doctor Who, Harry Potter: Goblet of Fire).  He is a menacing villain who manages to be repulsing and interesting at the same time.  I recommend this to not only fans of the superhero genre, but to everyone with eyeballs.

6. Finding comics: Saga and Invincible

 

When you like to read and you don’t particularly care for books it can be a tough life.  Lucky for me there are comic books, and it’s really lucky I found Invincible and Saga this year.  I know both of these series didn’t come out this year, so I’m lying again and guess what I don’t care. These two comics have become instantly some of my favorite on-going books around.  Saga is an epic space adventure that combines all the good action adventure of Star Wars, the dramatic character tension of Star Trek, with fantasy elements similar to Lord of the Rings.  It manages to use all of these elements in order to tell a captivating story of a family struggling to survive a war.  Its art is seriously something special and the book’s character development is even better.  Then there’s Invincible.  Robert Kirkman, creator of The Walking Dead, tells the super hero story every comic nerd has always dreamed of.  Invincible is a comic that plays with many superhero troupes we know so well, all that accompanied by great characters and unique plot twists.  This comic is something special and I am proud to call Invincible one of my favorite superheroes of all time.

5. The Flash TV Show

 

“My name is Barry Allen and I’m the fastest man alive.” Just that sentence does something to me, slightly sexual with a tad of love.  The Flash is my favorite show on TV, you may ask: “why?” I have no idea, but this show is like a drug to me.  I’m in love with the corny lines that remind me of a comic book, the surprisingly adequate special effects are enjoyable and the down right heart this show is lovely.  Every week I wait till Wednesday to watch this on demand. When I watch this I’m like a kid and I get mad if someone talks, just ask Cameron or Colt.  This is the show that was made for me.  I thought the first season was admirable, but the second season we currently watch is so much better than I could have hoped.  I mean it’s all about Patty, enough said. The Flash is my shit.

4. Daredevil (Netflix Show)

 

You must be blind if you didn’t think I’d put Daredevil up here.  If you don’t understand this pun I’m sorry because it’s hilarious.  The first Marvel Netflix show is one of the most legendary episodic stories ever told.  It’s compelling, dark, gritty, brutal, and it’s a superhero show.  Marvel really upped their game when releasing these 13 episodes, every night I still find myself wanting more Daredevil.  There’s something really special about this show, as I powered through the entire series captivated by both the hero and villain. There’s pure magic in the show that is obvious from the very start.  I was in loved with the man without fear, it’s Netflix’s best show and I recommend it to anyone.

3. Mad Max: Fury Road

 

“Oh what a day, what a lovely day” it is to be alive.  When you see Mad Max: Fury Road your life will probably change for better, unless you hate good movies.  This is without a doubt one of the best films of 2015 and it surprisingly spawns from an 80’s movie starring Mel Gibson.  Now this doesn’t star Mr. Gibson rather it stars Tom Hardy as Max, but it’s not a remake or even a sequel it’s like a little side quest for a guy named Max.  Though it’s not the script that makes this movie fantastic, it’s the use of visual storytelling and how director George Miller says so much without a character saying a word, in fact Max hardly ever talks.  This is visual story for the ages, it’s what a movie is supposed to be and that’s the reason everyone should see it.  Mad Max isn’t a movie that requires hardcore fans of a series or aims for the nerdy male audience, it’s an action movie for anyone.  All of the visual aspects are melded with the great Charlize Theron (Monster, Snow White and the Huntsman) who plays the most badass character in the entire movie.  It really is the year for strong women! I can’t stress how incredible Mad Max: Fury Road is.  It is an incredible film and possible Oscar winner, just do yourself a favor and watch it.

2. Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain

Imagine a game where you sneak into an enemy compound in all black silently taking out each guard in order to free a few captive prisoners; you escape without altering anyone to your presence.  Then I play that same mission, my helicopter lands blaring “Final Countdown” I’m dressed in a snazzy leopard print suit shooting rockets at each enemy in order to save those same prisoners. That is Metal Gear Solid V, a game with endless possibilities.  I sunk far too much time into this game and once I completed it I felt slightly lost.  There really hasn’t been anything quite like MGSV; its single objective missions make every outcome your own.  I found myself constantly discussing what happened to me in this game and loved hearing other people stories.  It’s a game that no two people could play the same way; it’s your own play style that forms your little moments that make one epic tale.  Metal Gear quickly jumped to my top 5 favorite video games of all time.

1. Star Wars: The Force Awakens

If you know anything about me you had to have guess this was number 1.  It’s Star Wars and not only that it’s the third best Star Wars ever made, sorry Return of the Jedi you’re number four now.  I can’t stress how epic the JJ Abrams Star Wars movie is, it’s perfect from the crawl all the way to the last shot of the movie. But just seeing this movie isn’t why it sits a top my list; it was the pure anticipation of seeing the film.  I’ve been stoked to see this movie since I was 12-years-old and never thought we would get another Star Wars adventure.  When it was announced in 2012 I’d been patiently waiting for what I knew would be a life-altering day. It finally came and it was marvelous.  This movie made me feel like a kid again. I sat there in that theater with a wide smile almost crying at every moment.  2015 ended as perfect as possible, it gave me the return of Star Wars and I couldn’t have been happier. If you haven’t seen The Force Awakens please do and if you don’t understand my love for Star Wars, read my Love Letter to Star Wars right here.

My Love Letter To Star Wars

To you this may be one of the dumbest things I’ve ever written, but to me it’s perhaps the most meaningful letter I will ever write. This is my love letter to Star Wars.

On average I reference Star Wars at least five times a day and that’s because I love Star Wars. I don’t just love it like the stereotypical white girl “loves” her Starbucks coffee or how a young man “loves” his favorite football team. No, I love Star Wars the way I love my family and that is because, in a stupid childish way, Star Wars is part of my family, it helped raise me, and for a lost kid that galaxy far far away was home. As I stand in line to watch Star Wars: The Force Awakens I know that I’m about to return home.

When a person asks me what my first memory is I know they think I’m lying, but the first moment I remember was a three year old Jake sitting in movie theater with his Mother, Father and possibly sister about to see some old movie called Star Wars.  I doubt anyone in that theater knew what was about happen, my small three year old life was about to change, I was about to fall in love for the first time.  I sat in that theater, the lights dimmed and the previews played, then everything changed as that 20^th Century Fox fanfare played and then two words flew at the screen “Star Wars”, the music howled and from that moment I was changed.  I was in love with a young farm boy, a dashing smuggler, a bold princess, a walking carpet, two droids and that galaxy they call home.

I’ve had girlfriends, old best friends, and past mentors, but Star Wars has always been there and I know no matter how old I am it will always be there. As I write this, I watch Return of the Jedi, in a room littered with Star Wars toys and three very important Star Wars posters.  These posters will eventually find frames and hang in my future living room despite my future wife’s wishes because to me Star Wars will always hold my heart.

In a weird way I doubt I could even explain why I love Star Wars.  I imagine it’s similar to that moment some asks why you love someone else; you start this laundry list of meaningful things that in reality don’t actually explain your love.  Of course I love Star Wars for Luke, Han, Vader, Lightsabers, X-Wings, Yoda, the story, or hell sometimes even the prequels, but that doesn’t explain it. So now I’m going to attempt to, in a very sappy over the top way.

If you’ve ever had a conversation with me you know I bleed Star Wars.  It’s in my roots; the very fiber of being is defined by Star Wars.  It’s similar to how a great teacher or grandparent can define someone, when life is truly awful and for someone with depression it occasionally gets awful I’ve always had a galaxy to escape to.  To me Star Wars isn’t just a movie, and it’s not just something I loved in my childhood and look back on fondly.  To me Star Wars helps save me from the dark side of myself everyday. It taught me hope in hopeless times that even Darth Vader could save the galaxy; Han showed me what a friend could be as he returned just in time to save Luke and help destroy the Death Star, and through those three films I learned to never give in to the dark side because you don’t where life will take you.

I learned way too much from three movies (the prequels didn’t teach me anything).  Yet, I don’t regret it or hide it. I wear it proudly on bedroom walls, most of my shirts and possibly soon my skin. Star Wars opened my imagination when I was three and just this morning I fought of two Sith Lords in my kitchen using a spatula as my lightsaber.  Star Wars has this marvelous ability to make me a child again, it fills me with an unexplainable amount of emotion that can, and has, literally brought tears to my eyes.

When another person talks about loving Star Wars, and I’m sure they do, it’s hard for me to imagine it compares to the wonderful sensation it has in my heart.  As selfish as it sounds Star Wars is mine, as a child I went on many of my own adventures with Luke, Han and Leia, they were my friends when I had none.  In this galaxy I didn’t have anxiety, I wasn’t in special education and I wasn’t afraid of my disability.  It the greatest place, it’s a place that not only showed me “movie magic”, but weirdly love. That one day you can be going to Toshi Station to pick up some power converters and the next day your last Jedi.  That’s the reason I will always love Star Wars because it’s mine in a way no one can possibly imagine.

Just as I write this I can see how dumb this sounds, but to me it means so much.  It’s just hard not to love it.  If you read to this I appreciate it, perhaps it can shed light on why I’m all Star Wars 24/7.

Now here we are on the verge of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, without even seeing it this movie has helped me through so much. It’s given me hope in hopeless times; just knowing that I get to return to my galaxy far far away is one of the best things. So to Star Wars I say thank you.

May the Force be with you,

Jake Burke